Fred on Christmas

This. . . I have nothing to say about this. . .

Gimme More. . . people to make fun of.

Today I'm shaving the hair of one of my best friends. Is it bad that I'm super excited to cut her hair all off? I've never shaved a girl's head before, lots of guys, but never a girl's. I hope I don't cry. I'm a big fan of my hair, so this is almost like chopping my own. Becky's pumped though, like she's been practicing come-backs in the mirror or something. It was awesome, for every person trying to convince her otherwise on Christmas Eve, she had a zinger right back at them, including my Mom.

I just hope she doesn't now marry a name-shortening rap-dancer, have two hygiene-impaired children, crash windows with umbrellas, drive cars without seat belts and children in her lap, and talk about adopting more children, specifically some chinese twin girls.

What, too soon? Oops, I did it again.

P.S. Christmas party last night

Also, Christmas for me isn't only one day, its like those 4 day weddings. There is just too much to celebrate in only one day and too many people (i.e. family) to see.

So last night at my dad's side family christmas party, I gave in to playing Apples to Apples. I hate this game. I never play it anymore because I'm tired of the competition, the debating, the whining, and the stomping away when someone doesn't win. So I vowed never to play it with my friends again. However, my family wore me down and started playing at a table I was sitting at anyway.

So there I am, with my Grandma, and 11 of my closest cousins. After a while the word "Wicked" is thrown down. So everyone throws in a noun, it was my turn to be judge so I'm looking through the pile and run across some good ones- I think I chose Elizabeth Taylor in the end, but there was one card that caught my attention. It said "My Family" on it.

Now who thinks that my family is wicked? Grandma raises her hand.



I didn't know this, but apparently for all the adjectives that you win, those are supposed to best describe yourself. So my cousins are getting good ones- hot, appetizing, important, perfect, etc.

As for me? I get annoying, industrious, busy, and silly. Bah Humbug.

Although, I did get a freebe by throwing down "Cheap Motel" for "Busy." Ah. Gotta love sexual humor to win any game.

Wow. My blogging has been pathetic.

I never talked about the time I went line dancing.

Well, it happened Friday, December 14. I remember this day because it is also the day I chopped 7 inches of my hair and didn't tell anyone. I love watching people's faces as they don't recognize me (at first) and then the sudden switch to the realization that I am, indeed, someone that they know. It's a good time. I had long hair in high school too and chopped it off into a bob. The best reaction I got was when I was at school. I was walking through the hallway and as I turned a corner Kelsey was yelling my name, almost like a shriek, because she was so startled by my haircut. I think I had to run to the bathroom right after that because I was laughing to hard (I almost peed my pants).

Do I digress?

Anyway, my friend Dea invited me to go along with her and her work buddies because at another attempt to go dancing with our mutual friends, it fell apart pathetically. Besides, she knew I was dying to go (sorry about the cliche) because I'm a fan of shaking it.

So after learning a few steps by a ex-line dancing teacher who happened to party there every weekend, we started to pick it up as we went along. I tell you, it's not as easy as it looks. There are lots and lots of spins, foot stomps, yelling, and kicks. Although, once you get it, you don't forget it. You kind of just have to get out there with all the other people, watch their feet, and follow. You get jumbled a bit, but its a fun frustration. All you can do is laugh and if you don't get it right away, make up your own steps.

It was a little embarrassing to be shown up by the 60+ year old people, two stepping their way around you. However, after awhile, they too take you aside and teach you the steps as they go along.

Also, the lottery was there. I won a Nalgene water bottle. :)

Manners- what happened to them.

Kind of annoying- I was ringing up a customer today and I had the garment that she was purshasing in my hands. I was taking off the sensor and she grabbed the shirt from me, inspected it, and threw it onto the counter. Completely caught off guard, I glared, picked the shirt back up, and continued to ring. I was a little distressed.

A little later, I was folding sweaters on the same counter, when another customer pushed my things to the side, and threw down her garments. The sweaters almost fell off and onto the floor.

Seriously? I mean, come on. What happened to curtesy?

Teeth pullin' and schemin'

So I was talking to my Dad about the dentist last night, I had hand motions and everything. It was an intense story, see below. We were discussing the cost of having my wisdom teeth pulled and how it wasn't covered by my insurance and if I really needed it and if so, he could do it.

Yeah, Dad offered it do it for much CHEAPER! I said, "No way, I'd probably end up at the hospital."

Dad said, "At least that would be covered by your insurance."

Next time, I'm calling in sick

I get to my car this morning and it was frozen. The door latch was stuck in the open position, so the door would just bounce against the car side and stay ajar. I hope everyone understands what I mean when I say this.

I couldn't get the door to CLOSE!

If I held onto the door tightly, I could lock it. The door light stayed on, but it was shut. The only reason why I didn't take off right there was I was a little nervous that the door would fly open while I was on the highway, or unstick in the parking lot (and I would never see the car again).

SO, I called Dad. He said get out the WD40, and spray spray spray. It leaked over my fingers and just made the latch colder and soggy. He also said to get a hair dryer and heat the latch, but I didn't have the time to grab all the tools I needed to pull that off. So I just pumped the heat on inside the car, hoping for the same effect.

While waiting, I called people for help. Grandma was the first to pick up. I was near tears, so she was on the road right away to get me to work. It was 9:10 and I was supposed to be there at 9. Once she arrived, she informed me that she no longer takes LEFT TURNS and avoids the HIGHWAY whenever she can. It was a litte awkward.

Then, of course I had a dentist appointment today and I was just getting frustrated with Mom. I called her on my break and she didn't understand that I wouldn't be able to turn a 20 minute drive into 10 minutes. Here's why:

Reason #1: I didn't have a car
Reason #2: If I got a ride, I still wouldn't be the one driving. . . or fast enough
Reason #3: I wasn't 100% sure I remembered how to get there
Reason #4: I wouldn't be able to get to the parking lot before 4:05- I've timed it
Reason #5: The appointment was at 4:10
Reason #6: Staff was low today, meaning lots of big projects to finish before leaving

Mom sort of just said, (paraphrasing, of course) "make it happen or cancel the appointment." I had a shortend break due to arriving late, so I had no time to call the stupid dentist. Which choice do you think I chose?

Good news: The Dentist said I inspire him to brush. . . after I found out I have to have three wisdom teeth pulled soon, (paying with insurance I don't have) was sprayed in the face with gritty tooth polish, and knocking over four bottles of Listerine.

I really do want to see Harry Potter fight an Ogre muppet.

I'm a little bored with all the special effects in movies these days. Unless it's something I haven't seen before, like a baby carriage blown up, I don't really need it. Today, it's all about CGI. I think it's cool that we can make movies solely on a computer, no camera needed, but it drives me crazy when they only use it to short cut (ahem, George Lucas, cough cough). George Lucas, you say? I have this theory as to why people like the first set of Star Wars movies from the 70's better than the second set of the 90's and 00's. Yoda. He used to be a muppet. A very hands-on, real, and I could touch him, muppet. NOW, he's a look towards the green screen, invisible, pretend he's sitting next to you, develop a complex, CGI cartoonish shorty. People just like the muppets, sorry Georgie. Look how much hard work went into that first set of movies, I'm not saying people don't like the newer movies, they do (I love Natalie Portman), but it's just not the same.

Another example, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Why did they use CGI to duplicate the Oompa Loompas? Is it too much trouble to get more actors? The scenery didn't match the actors (with lighting and such) and the Oompa Loompas only matched themselves. Let's get more technical people! In film school they teach you not to make your characters look like 3D pop-up stickers.

I think that's why I love classic movies so much. It's innocent and amazing what kinds of sets and costumes and creatures they had to build (yeah, that's right build, no CGI here), and it was based off of great dialogue. I really am a sucker for great dialogue. Nowadays, script comes second, and effects first. Did anyone see that movie when Fred Astaire tap-danced up the wall, onto the ceiling, and back down again? That wasn't a camera trick, it was the set that was turning around.

Alright, enough of that. I need food.

If only I had a convertible

One time as I was driving along, I began considering Ghandi and
all he had to say about nonviolent resistance, and his love for all
creatures man and beast. It was a beautiful day, and I was looking at
the sky, and I must have hit literally 200 chickens.

a not-so-much retraction

Did anyone notice that I put "Lunkily" instead of "Luckily" for my November 26th post? Wow. "C" and "N" aren't even that close to each other on the keyboard.

I like to make up words that sound like other words and mean the same thing as those other words. . . you know, just to confuse people.





Hey, I think I need a haricut.

This is when I really had things to talk about

Look at these old Facebook posts I left for Lee.

Robyn Reeves wrote
at 10:17am on April 26th, 2005
Leet, this is your best friend talking. Where are you right now? I think you found agood picture. Did you notice that I put "agood"? It actually really is a typo, but I am too lazy to go back and fix it, so instead I am going to sit here and talk about my mistake because that is how bored I am. I like inventing new words. Its fun. I feel another one coming......gwad. Ha ha ha. Wouldn't you like to know what that means? It's a secret... I mean, really that's what it means "secret" because I said so. I'm not hiding this from you really. Ok, I'm going to stop typing before I make myself look anymore like a loser. Too late. Bye. -Beet

Robyn Reeves wrote
at 6:42pm on May 26th, 2005
Lee, This is your best friend talking...again. I hope everything is great. I miss you madly. I read Aaron's comment and it sounds like he wants to eat you. He is a wolf. You should read this passage in a french accent, it makes it funnier. I'm not feeling very witty at the moment so you are going to have to meet me half-way on this one. Yadda yadda yadda. I just put that there because with a french accent it is high-larious. Anyway, bye. ~Robyn

If I only had a brain. . . or a job

I feel very much blocked when it comes to writing these days. Maybe I've been out of material? Great, I'm not a fan of being a half-way almost grown-up. Lunkily, half-way almost grown-ups don't have to pay rent because their parents are awesome, so I can volunteer instead of trying to make lots of money in something that's NOT my field. I don't need money. People get crazy and materialistic over it. To set things straight, I'm not being lazy when it comes to job searching. I'm trying as best as I can when I'm not working at my current overbearing job. Let's just hope that doors will open up soon, especially once the holiday season lets up. I like how I wrote that last sentence like I was talking about rain, because the holidays can cause such a drizzle. . . but in a good way. Speaking of which, this year I have to participate in the adult's White Elephant gift exchange this year. I've been bumped from the little cousin Secret Santa. I guess my family doesn't believe in half-way almost grown-ups.

Will Ferrell is The Phantom of the Opera

Nathan found this. . . it cracked me up.

Still trying to get my own Roman Holiday. . .

So I learned from Becky, at dinner tonight, that the word "romance" comes from Rome. Sort of interesting that some things are so obvious that even when you look straight at them it doesn't click. It's kind of like when you're trying to find your glasses and they're on top of your head. Anyway, this only helps my case when I say that Italy is a wonderful place to be when you have a "someone."

Those Romans, they get it right.

deadly reading habits

I feel like I need to write some inspiratinal after that stupid, stupid rant. . . but I got nothing. Sorry guys. It's been a long, long week, but things are much better.

So instead, I'm going to insert an interesting story here:

(March 1993, Florida) A 24-year-old salesman from Hialeah was killed near Lantana in March when his car smashed into a pole in the median strip of Interstate 95 in the middle of the afternoon. Police said that the man was traveling at 80 MPH and, judging by the sales manual that was found open and clutched to his chest, had been busy reading.

Got any other bright ideas?

It's late and I'm frustrated. My computer is being unbelievably slow due to media uploading issues for my new website. I can't take it anymore. I'm tired and thinking about throwing this stupid laptop through the tree that's tapping at the window. I know that sounds hard to do . . . to throw a laptop through one side of a tree so it will smash out of the other, but I am just that frustrated. I could make that happen, I think.

I feel like I'm being picked on, sort of. Not by God, but maybe it is by God? I mean, there isn't another higher power up there and I know I'm being really selfish right now, but I feel like everything that I've been trying to complete lately is blowing up in my face. Yes, there are less fortunate people out there. Yes, everyone has bad days, weeks, months, years. Yes, it probably could be worse. Yes, I could probably just use some help and a hug.

I finally caved in and asked for help yesterday, after almost two weeks of me being stubborn and trying to figure it out on my own. I know that sounds bad, but I always feel like the reward is greater when I do it myself. Like when you save up for a trip, without anyone else chipping in. Or when you clean up your room, without anyone telling you to or helping out, just because you wanted to.

Anyway, I digress.

I know there is a line that I crossed somewhere, when was the right time to back down and ask for help? It seems like I'm the only one in my family who speaks computer jargon. And the people I've called only really know what I'm talking about if they look at it, because my computer problem is so screwed up. However, they can't look at it because I work terrible hours and till late (later now because of the holiday season) and they have real jobs starting very early.

Does this mean I should stop trying to strive for the internship? Is this a sign? They wanted me to do a small assignment for them, which I've been putting endless amounts of hours into, but all this work and no payoff, does that mean it's not the right time yet? I feel picked on. I'm going to be stuck in this terrible retail gig and no other job opportunity is going to show up and I'm going to be the failure stuck in her parents house until they die all because I couldn't get a website working properly.

Maybe that's a little dramatic.

Dear God,
Help me move out. I love your work.
Best regards, Robyn.

A PEEK inside the employee handbook

". . . all staff must practice proper hygeine routines before arriving to work, otherwise. . ."

Um. . .


Yeah, I'm in trouble.

Dad's diet #1

#1: Today Dad went searching for the last disappearing marshmellow bar inside the garbage can.

I made a new friend!

Jason's holding the lid from a can of spackle, "You know those movies where a person gets a face full of pie? This kind of looks like that."

Me, "Are you saying that lid looks like pie?"

"Doesn't it look like that?"

"Not really."

"Are you sure? I can test it out on your face."

"If you're saying that's like pie, you must be willing to eat it then."

"I don't like spackle pie."

"Well, I don't like a face full of spackle. . . or lemon meringue."

"I love lemon meringue. How do you not like lemon meringue?"

"Do you like pumpkin pie?"

"Yes, I love pumpkin pie!"

"Those are the only 2 pies I don't like."

"Well, I don't like you!"

"Well, pie doesn't like you! I want to push you off that ladder. Can I push you off that ladder? Would you be mad if I pushed you off that ladder?"

"You could try, but I'd land on my feet."

"Like a cat?"

"Well, if I don't land on my feet, as soon as I got back up I come after you and I run fast."

"Oooh. I'm so scared."

"You better be."

The verdict and they even apologized

Hmmmmm. Well, I went into work today and I still have a job. Shamalama!

Dum dum dum

So I was scheduled to work till 9 p.m. last night, but on the daily breakdown my name went till 11 p.m. I was frustrated. I don't mind working extra hours, because basically we could all use the extra money, but the fact it was British Thanksgiving and they ASSUMED I had no life to stay and work, AND they never asked me too in the first place. . . . . . . . it's all just an insult to my way of being. Deep right?

Of course me being who I am, I'm terrible with confrontation, so I almost never do it. I'm usually that character in the movie who just deals with the fact they're being stepped on and moves on. I usually just get my revenge later on and secretly.

Grudges are dumb.

If there is a point where there is absolutely no way out of the situation, I'll rehearse and rehearse and rehearse what I'm going to say and then breathlessly whip out word vomit to the antagonist. OR write out a letter. Usually, I won't send them.

Still pathetic.

Anyway, since confontation seemed like a bad idea(at the time) AND I didn't care if I were to get fired, since I hate my job anyway (I'm using very little creativity at work) I just decided to leave. One reason I haven't been able to quit yet was because of the confrontation factor. So, I didn't tell anyone, I just grabbed my stuff out of my locker and left the building at the time I was originally scheduled to end my shift. 9 p.m.

Sadly, I wasn't sneaky about it all, I just left and went to British Thanksgiving. I'm a little sad I didn't make more of a spy thing out of it, I was probably just so mad I wanted to get out of there. Anyway, I won't know till Wednesday if they found out or not.

We'll see.

Gene Kelly comercial

I'm still speechless. I must have watched this 7 times.

hAppY hAllOwEEn!

not for keeps sake

Friday I cleaned my room out, it was stress-relieving, it really was. I was angry with my mom, so I felt motivated to finish something. It still isn't done, but it's closer than its ever been. All those college boxes were starting to haunt me.

So, I have two closets in my room, one giant one for clothes, which was very easy to clean out, and then a smaller one, with toys and swag and junk that I've been collecting since elementary school. I've been putting off cleaning this closet for a long time now. I mean, there is stuff upon stuff upon stuff, litte towers of stacked memorabilia, clips of old papers tacked to the inside walls. . . bascially, I have to stand back when I open the door because I know stuff will fall out. It's a big job I need a lot of motivation in order to do it.

I'm not a pack rat or anything, but for some reason I'd throw the junk into the closet and shove the door real fast. I'd do this not for keeps sake, but to get the space I needed in my room for something else.

It's kind of enchanting when you think about it. I have a closet full of things, lots of things, and it's kind of cool to think about how much of my childhood is wrapped up in this 3' x 3' closet. . .

but I hade to clean it out anyway. . . because mom said. I'm the worst 22 year old ever, I know.

So I was going through my things and if anyone knows of anyone who might like any of these things let me know, I may be able to part with them for a better home:

20+ candles, plus 1 decapitated wizard-shaped candle
3 headed porcelin dog statue
caboodle on the outside, mini toy mall on the inside
10+ snowglobes and 1 waterless snowglobe (saddest looking thing ever)
slightly used school folders by Paul Frank (90's stlye)
giant hair clips
a set of stencils to get a perfect zig-zag part in your hair
mouse and cheese statue
wide range sticker collection
back scratcher
Doodle bear with markers
handmade and non-handmade baskets
spongey hair curlers
every Disney toy I've ever collected out of happy meals or board games
Antique tea set
gold shawl
stuffed animals
a box marked "Sekrit stuf" (have yet to open it)
a rose that lights up (secretly a flashlight)
a plastic crown, with jewels
a glass rose case, engraved "Robin Jr. Bridesmaid"
shoe boxes filled with notes from kids in class
a decopaged shoe box filled with keychains
spirit gum and remover
disco ball

and this is just two of the four shelves.

everything will be ok

it was late at night and sort of foggy and
humid and there was a big
party far below on the beach that somehow
featured a three story rose that was all lit
up, alongside an equally
gigantic leather couch,
of sort of a breath mint green. he
remembered thinking, "gee,
that's quite a couch they've got down there" and
wandered
away by himself to a dark edge of the cliff, where
hundreds of feet
straight
below
him, the deep sea
swelled against the rocks.

and if bill leaned over the edge and squinted his eyes just
right
he could make out the
gray shapes of all the cars that
had driven off the cliff over
the years,
sunken deep beneath the surface.

and
as each wave washed slowly over
them, the undertow
quietly puller their headlights
on and off,
in an endless loop.
the blinking lights were pretty to look at, but
bill was afraid to go
any
nearer because
the water was haunted.

the following night bill had a lot of ice cream and
dreamt of a
giant ape crashing through a fence.

Sounds familiar

Bob Newhart looks deep into the camera and explains why his wife is upset with him.

He asks his wife, "Honey, is there something wrong?" and she said, "I had a dream last night, and we were at a party, and you spent the entire party dancing with another girl."
Bob says, "b-but it was a dream."
She says, "but it's just the thing you would do."

lunch interview

Today I met God in female form.

Kelsey quote of the week

"Hey, stop touching your sister's butt!"

One of my favorite scenes from a movie. . .

INT. GUEST BEDROOM - NIGHT

A portable fan quietly WHIRRS in the corner. Turned low, the
RADIO on the nightstand is playing a call-in AM sports show,
just a wash of background chatter. Edward lies asleep on his
back.

At the window, Josephine quietly lowers the shade. She reaches
over Edward to switch off the radio. He stirs from the silence --
he wasn't fully asleep -- and sees Josephine stretched over
him.

EDWARD
(playfully lecherous)
Hello.

She smiles.

JOSEPHINE
Hi. How are you feeling?

EDWARD
I was dreaming.

JOSEPHINE
What were you dreaming about?

He tries to recollect, but it's already gone. Josephine
motions, is it okay for her to sit on the bed? He nods.

EDWARD
I don't usually remember unless
they're especially portentous. You
know what that word means, portentous?

She shakes her head.

EDWARD
Means when you dream about something
that's going to happen.
(beat, gathering)
Like one night, I had a dream where
this crow came and told me, "Your
Aunt is going to die." I was so scared
I woke up my parents. They told me
it was just a dream, to go back to
bed. But the next morning, my Aunt
Stacy was dead.

JOSEPHINE
That's terrible.

EDWARD
Terrible for her, but think about
me, young boy with that kind of power.
Wasn't three weeks later that the
crow came back to me in a dream and
said, "Your Grampa is going to die."
Well, I ran right back to my parents.
My father said, no, Gramps is fine,
but I could see there was trepidation.
And true enough, that next morning
my Grampa was dead.

He sits up a bit in bed, his strength returning.

EDWARD
For the next couple weeks, I didn't
have another dream. Until one night
the crow came back and said, "Your
Daddy is going to die."
(beat)
Well, I didn't know what to do. But
finally I told my father. And he
said not to worry, but I could tell
he was rattled. That next day, he
wasn't himself, always looking around,
waiting for something to drop on his
head. Because the crow didn't tell
how it was going to happen, just
those words: your Daddy is going to
die. Well, he went into town early
and was gone for a long time. And
when he finally came back, he looked
terrible, like he was waiting for
the axe to fall all day. He said to
my mother, "Good God. I just had the
worst day of my life."
(beat)
"You think you've had a bad day,"
she said. "This morning the milkman
dropped dead on the porch!" Josephine
smiles, a half-laugh, which gets him
smiling too.

A long beat. Then, deadpan...

EDWARD
Because see, my mother was banging
the milkman.

JOSEPHINE
No, I understand. Can I take your picture?

EDWARD
You don't need a picture. Just look
up handsome in the dictionary.

I've never been like THIS before

Robyn Reeves: Go-with-the-flow by day, Impulsive by night.

I don't really like it either.

They call me Ishmael

So at work (my new work not my old work) according to the work handbook, I'm not allowed to say where I work, because any news I may have about it will appear negative to someone, even if I may have something great to say.

So at my new work, I wear a name badge, and because I'm new, looking at everyone elses is a positive (80+ people work there and I have yet to meet all of them). However, me wearing one doesn't seem to help anyone else.

I have a tight group with the other trainees that I'm working next too, so there's no name problems there. It's a group of about 6 or 7.

Our place is 2 floors, I'm on the bottom floor, but a quarter of the people on the top floor call me, "That girl who makes eep! noises." Monday it was shortened to "Eepie."

Another quarter on the top floor calls me "Veronica Mars," because I look like the T.V. teenage spy. I don't mind that one because I really do want to be a spy. . . and she's not that bad looking.

One of my trainors calls me "The Boy Wonder," because of Batman obviously, but he didn't come up with that one on his own, he's not that smart. I told him that's what they used to call me in high school and he just really liked it.

Two of the managers call me "The Great Robino," because I used to play a lot of soccer. I'm not sure about that one either.

Then, there is the most interesting one, it just happened today actually. The entire bottom floor is now calling me, "Delilah." Here goes:
So there's this very popular song taking over the radio called, "Hey There, Delilah." Its a catchy tune I must say. In fact, when it played for the 8th time today, I couldn't help but sing along because a.) I was bored and b.) I've learned the words. . . coercively.
One employee noticed my vocal chords and said (This next part is going to seem like story hour) Hey, that's pretty good.
Me: Thanks.
1: Yeah. Do you have their cd?
Me: No, I'm not really into them. I only know the one song.
1: Oh, I can like burn it for you? It's pretty good.
2: Who's that?
1: The Plain White T's.
2: Oh, I can get you a cd? I know them. I can get lots of copies.
Me: You know them?! How do you know them?
2: They're from around here. I know them.
1: Oh yeah, I think I knew that. Do you like party with them?
2: I used to a lot, but they're popular now. So only sometimes.
1: That's like so freakin' sweet.
Me: I wish I knew someone famous.
1: Is like Delilah a real person?
2: Oh yeah. She turned him down though. Long distance. Never gave him a chance.
1: What? This girl had a song written about her and she dumped him?
Me: Whoa.
2: Some girls, man. I think it was the distance. He's not very good-looking though.
Me: I'd marry a guy if he wrote me a song. I mean, all that shouldn't matter.
2: You're kinda like her, you know? but better. You could be her.
1: Yeah, you're Delilah, but the gooder Delilah. . . and you can sing.
Me: What?
1: Yeah, You're Delilah. I'm calling you Delilah.
2: Delilah. Gotta go take to the register. Later, Delilah.

I'm paraphrasing a little because my memory is only working in short fragments, but this is basically what happened. Also, this story is better if you do it in different voices.

I wonder how many more names I can rack up by the end of the year.

Who knew there was good t.v. in the 60's.

When you find yourself in danger,
When you're threatened by a stranger,
When it looks like you will take a lickin',

(puk, puk, puk, puk)

There is someone waiting,
Who will hurry up and rescue you,
just Call for Super Chicken!

(puk, ack!)

Fred, if you're afraid you'll have to overlook it,
Besides you knew the job was dangerous when you took it

(puk, ack!)

He will drink his super sauce
And throw the bad guys for a loss
And he will bring them in alive and kickin'

(puk, puk, puk, puk)

There is one thing you should learn
When there is no one else to turn to
Call for Super Chicken!

(puk, puk, puk, puk)

Call for Super Chicken!

(puk, ack!)


Play the real thing!!
info.

I just watched a surprisingly good movie. . .

Principal Holmstead: How am I ever going to get through to you?
Kelly Ernswiler: Well, advertising executives use status and sex to appeal to my demographic

Football Schmootball

Before the terrible Bears/Packers game, Mom and I decorated the house Halloween-style. In that last sentence I was just going to say that we decorated the house, and not leave the holiday to come, because I was thinking that everyone probably knows what fantastic month we are in, but then I forgot February of '94. I disliked Valentines Day so much, with the pink and the purple hearts, and the frou frou, and sickly lovey dovey-ness that I started to decorate for St. Patrick's Day instead.

Green is my favorite color. . . ever.

However, I was caught in the act and immediately replaced all the green shamrocks with pink hearts and stars.

Anyway, I'm sure no one would really ask me, "Robyn, so what theme were you decorating your house in this time?" because not many people know this story, but just in CASE you might happen to wonder this is why I may switch the holiday theme.

Yeah, that's right. I do what I want.

When Dad isn't here to do the praying for us. . .

Mom: "Um, dear Heavenly Father thanks. . . t-thank you f-for. . ."
Robyn: "Amen!"

Yes, I'm posessed. Wait, I didn't mention that?

Okay, so in high school, once a year we'd go on a retreat to Oregon, Il. In that town was Stronghold Castle, literally a castle. It's freakin' sweet, secret passageways, knights, towers, everything. Anyway, in the tallest tower of the castle is a mural about the story of Rumpelstiltskin. It's a circular area that starts at the doorway, curves around the room and ends back at the doorway. At the end of the story of Rumpelstiltskin, the little dwarf man stomps a hole down into Hell. Well, this was a really detailed mural so I was looking into what Hell entails, I found the typical demons, fire, gross creatures. Then, looking a little deeper I found insects and spiders. Next to the light switch I found one particular, disgusting spider, WITH MY FACE ON IT!

Uncanny. I know.

How weird is that? This mural was painted in 1929. Why would the face shape, the hairstyle, and the GLASSES look exactly like me? That style wasn't present in 1929 and NEITHER WAS I!

So all in all, I came to the conclusion that I must be posessed. My fate has apparently already been decided for me. When I die I'm turning into a spider. I think this is why a lot of spooky things happen to me.

The first picture is me in high school and the second picture is from the mural, both taken in 2002.

Try a Little Tenderness

I'm not a huge fan of the movie "Pretty in Pink" because I don't really like Molly Ringwald's character, but I do LOVE this scene. Its absolutely fantastic and brilliant for Jon Cryer to do. He's probably the best thing to ever happen to this movie. I mean, it's obvious he's the comic relief, but for me he's also the hero that saves the film. This is strange for me to say because I'm a big fan of 80's flicks. So I really don't know why this one didn't cut it. Sorry guys.

Enjoy the clip!!

I may have a big appetite

I think I'm going to enter into an eating contest.

Good idea? I mean, I ate a Chipotle burrito Saturday night and I wasn't even full afterwards. I'm also not a picky eater. The only foods I don't like are seafood, pancakes, and bacon and how many eating contests are there of those? I think I'll be able to hold my own.

I'll have to start preparing. . .

HAPPY OCTOBER!!!!

I KNOW this is going to be a great month, I can feel it. This is the best month of the year. I hope everyone can get into it as much as I do. I mean, when else can you say "All Hallow's Eve." It's so much fun to say, everyone together now: "ALL HAL-LOW'S EVE." Ha ha. Yeah!

I love October so much. I love the colors outside, crunching on leaves, the SMELL, preparing for Halloween (my favorite holiday), scary movie marathons, harvests, pumpkin picking out of the garden, carving, apples and caramel, bon fires, hayrides, reading scary stories, Fright Fest, costuming, CANDY, fall clothes, Danny Elfman/Tim Burton duo, and Haunted houses.

I probably seem a little psycho, but don't worry, I'll be back November 1st.

Common logic

The distance between your brain and your heart is a very long ways away.

Awkward situation story time

So last week, sorry I didn't blog about this earlier, time slips by when you're working 2 jobs, anyway so last week I was working in the kitchen at the Golf Course (last day was yesterday!!) and meandering on over to the customer service to talk with the matured men (that means they're over the age of 75, but they have really interesting talks about 'the old days'). I didn't have any cleaning or food preparing to do because well. . . let's face it, it was a weekday and no longer summer. Kids are in school, retired people are thinking about dinner plans or napping, and non-retired people are at work. So I'm listening to the men talk about their golf game, when a guy my age comes to the desk and asks for horseshoes. I take a step back to let the customer service man do his job, and that's when I decide to take another look at the guy. He seemed familiar, but I couldn't remember his face.
He waved at me and said, "Hey." That's when it clicked, another guy I used to date shows up at work, except this one I haven't seen in 4 years. So of course the only thing I can think of to do is smile, back away, and "find chores to do in the kitchen" in Robyn language means, "hide."
The Head cook noticed I was acting "motivated," something apparently unusual to him, and laughed at me. He basically said to stop being goofy because it was 4 years ago, you're two different people now, probably a lot cooler than I was then. Thanks Head cook.
Anyway, I decided to dry mop the multi-purpose room for awhile. When I was finished I went to grab some water, I noticed in the reflection of the windows that he was returning the horseshoes and then came nearer to find me. I ran back and dry mopped the multipurpose room again.

Coast is clear.

An hour later, Danny comes in to work because school is now over. I'm talking to him about high school things, probably Homecoming stuff, and that's when ex-guy comes and says hello. Completely by surprise. Since I was caught off-guard, I gave in. I had a conversation for ten whole minutes. Typical small talk stuff- what did you major in, what are you up to now, no I haven't seen that kid in awhile, yeah that girl is still a doofus, grad school huh? It wasn't horrible, but he seemed completely different to me. More into science than theater, like I remembered.
His phone rang. He had to take the call and left. Then Danny and I went back to talking again. Danny was pretty much making fun of me for being me. Then ex-guy came BACK. He apologized because it was his boss who could help him find work during grad school. I can't believe he told me, like he was worried I was thinking it was his girlfriend or something. OR like he was thinking I was turned off for him taking a phone call.
So we talk for a couple more minutes and he gives me his digits! Not only his home number, but his cell, and his email! Just in case one of them didn't work.
He said I can call anytime and was eluding to the fact that he didn't have plans tonight. I guess I made a good impression even though I was at work, in work uniform, totally rolled out of bed to go, and dodging him the first two times. Plus, I had a sarcastic high school kid staring us down from behind. Yeah, I could feel his eyes judging me.

Anyway, in 5 words, I haven't called ex-guy yet.

"This is how I grab ideas for my stories," says the screenwriter.

Do you ever get tired of yourself? Like, do you ever feel like you're completely disgusted with who you are and wish for just one hour could be someone else? I mean, there may not be anything wrong with you at all, but you're just tired of being you? Doing the same old things, saying the same old things, being the same old thing, etc.

When I was in high school, I'd pick out a random kid in the lunch room and develop my own story about who they are and why they act the way they did. . . all in my head, of course. I think that's why I love people watching. I'm just fascinated with the way people socialize and behave. I hated the college parties, but if I was dragged to a random stranger's house, I'd be the one secretly spying on others, eavesdropping into conversations, and then fending off boys the rest of the time, of course. Just kidding. But seriously, so many boys. Ha.

Maybe I'm not tired of myself, but just bored. A wise teacher once told me that if you're bored, it's because you're boring. So I try not to say that I'm bored. However, right now I don't feel as exciting and as adventurous as I used to be. I'd used to take midnight joy rides and let my soul evaporate into the music on the road. . . and barefoot. You had to be barefoot too. I always got a lot of thinking done when it was just me and Donny (my crazy chevy).

Now, I'll pretend to be someone else for a minute. I see a lot of people at work. So sometimes I'll copy a mannerism I see or speak with an accent I overhear. For some reason, it takes me out of the world, just for a minute. It makes life more interesting. I should really be an actress. This is totally an acting exercize, isn't it?

I guess until I find a 'me' I really like I'll have to play off of others. It's like Kelsey's adopt-a-laugh.

How can you NOT like cats?

So I'm not a fan of cats, I'll admit it. No problem. Here's why:

My Wisconsin grandparents had a fierce tabby cat named Spike. Can you sense the evil already? This special little hairball was a hunter, and a scratcher, and a life ruiner of little children. He was a stray that jumped into their moving car, probably escaping from Hades.

Now, usually domestic felines will leave you alone if you leave THEM alone, because they think they're God. HOWEVER, this animal was a special hunter! The demon would come after NathaN and I, even if we were minding our own business, like watching Nickelodeon (we never had cable before) and try to scratch us. It was bad news. I'm surprised he didn't wear a spiked collar in order to live up to his name, oh wait. . . he DID!! I remember lots of times running into the other room, using a mirror to peer around corners, and pushing NathaN ahead of me, I guess as a sacrifice.

So if you ever see me resist the urge to pet your "friendly" cat, do not fret. I may be "suffering" from this "condition" for the rest of my life. "Your cat saved a child, you say? Do you mind if I try to flush your cat down the toliet?"

The ideas you get from online

This has been such a strange day. My head is so dizzy that whenever I stand up, I have to sit back down and try again. It's hot in my house. So I'm thinking that because I'm dehydrated that is why I'm so dizzy? I don't know if I even AM dehydrated, I've been drinking a lot of water, so much that I'm peeing clear. . . and every half hour. It's so annoying to drop your pants and re-tye them that often.

I also made dinner for the family tonight. I got the recipe from Rachel Ray's website. I think she's neat because we have the same initials. I made gluten-free pasta and vegetables with a pesto sauce and dallop of ricotta cheese. Mom says ricotta like "rigatta" because she says thats how the Italians say it. She wants to move to Italy so bad. She had a glass of wine tonight while I was fixing dinner. Mom and I liked the meal, but we both thought the recipe needed a spicy meat, like chorizo. Strange how we can't eat a dinner without some sort of meat. Dad told me my effort was good. That means in Dad language he didn't like it.

Right now, I'm watching "Disturbia." I have such a crush on Shia Labeouf. I'm so jealous of the girl he makes out with 316 times. At school, I was pretty much known as "the girl who has a thing for Shia," I've made buttons. I was also know as "the girl who owned a button-maker." Oh ebay.

Hmmm. Look at this picture here. He has such a cute escort. Looks like he's having a great time!

Into the Wild

So I've always wanted to backpack, go on an adventure, meet new people, run into different cultures, search for my soul, etc.

I was getting ready for work and on t.v. was Oprah. She was interviewing Sean Penn and Emile Hirsch. Sean directed a new movie called, "Into the Wild." It sounded so fascinating, Sean brought clips from the film and the sound, the music, the color, everything looks fantastic. Anyway, the story is what caught my attention the most. . . and it's based on real events.

It's about a man named Christopher McCandless. After college, he well, traveled. Here's a link to his story. It's so interesting.

Now, yes it didn't end so well, but it was LIVING. It was excitement. It was seeing what the world really entails and breathing in every bit of it. I'm so jealous he had the nerve to pack up and just go. It seems like now I'm in a rut and thrill-seeking is moving quickly to the bottom of my to do list. For now I guess I'll just bask in the mini adventures I encounter everyday.

Anyway, more info on the movie is here. I hope you all will be like me and attend opening night. . . I plan on taking notes. ;)


Oh and by the way, I was late to work on that day. Thank you Oprah.

Written by an Australian Dentist

This was sent to me in an email and I haven't checked it out on Snopes.com yet to see if it's true, but it has a nice feeling to it anyway.


To Kill an American
You probably missed this in the rush of news, but there was actually a report that someone in Pakistan had published in a newspaper, an offer of a reward to anyone who killed an American, any American.

So an Australian dentist wrote an editorial the following day to let everyone know what an American is. So they would know when they found one. (Good one, mate!!!!)

"An American is English or French or Italian, Irish, German, Spanish, Polish, Russian or Greek. An American may also be Canadian, Mexican, African, Indian, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Australian, Iranian, Asian or Arab or Pakistani or Afghan.

An American may also be a Comanche, Cherokee, Osage, Blackfoot, Navaho, Apache, Seminole or one of the many other tribes known as native Americans.

An American is Christian or he could be Jewish or Buddhist or Muslim. In fact, there are more Muslims in America than in Afghanistan The only difference is that in America they are free to worship as each of them chooses.

An American is also free to believe in no religion. For that he will answer only to God, not to the government, or to armed thugs claiming to speak for the government and for God.?

An American lives in the most prosperous land in the history of the world.

The root of that prosperity can be found in the Declaration ofIndependence , which recognizes the God given right of each person to the pursuit of happiness.

An American is generous. Americans have helped out just about every other nation in the world in their time of need, never asking a thing in return.

When Afghanistan was over-run by the Soviet army 20 years ago, Americans came with arms and supplies to enable the people to win back their country!

As of the morning of September 11, Americans had given more than any other nation to the poor in Afghanistan Americans welcome the best of everything...the best products, the best books, the best music, the best food, the best services. But they also welcome the least.

The national symbol of America, The Statue of Liberty, welcomes your tired and your poor, the wretched refuse of your teeming shores, the homeless, tempest tossed. These in fact are the people who built America.

Some of them were working in the Twin Towers the morning of September 11, 2001 earning a better life for their families. It's been told that the World Trade Center victims were from at least 30 different countries, cultures, and first languages, including those that aided and abetted the terrorists.

So you can try to kill an American if you must. Hitler did. So did Gen eral Tojo, and Stalin, and Mao Tse-Tung, and other blood-thirsty tyrants in the world. But, in doing so you would just be killing yourself . Because Americans are not a particular people from a particular place. They are the embodiment of the human spirit of freedom. Everyone who holds to that spirit, everywhere, is an American.

my new nickanme "pizza face"

Kelsey frequently talks about my ability to eat a medium pizza all by myself, like its my greatest accomplishment. Well, I guess I can brag today I achieved my goal. . . again. What a high!





Carla: "This is disgusting." She points to her engagement ring.
Turk: "Why is this disgusting?"
Kid: "Because it was in my butt."

I ran up a hill and fell down the side

So i have two little scabs on my ring finger of the right hand and I can't figure out how I got them. I mean, it looks like I got bit by a rookie vampire and they missed my neck completely, I mean this hand is obviously NOT my neck. Ridiculous. Looking closer at the marks, it's definitely a scab, meaning it must have bled at some point, but why don't I know when or how? Really, c'mon. Am I this ignorant? Maybe I've just been way too busy lately to notice. Has anyone else noticed that's probably why my blogs have been lacking? It's not because I've run out of stories.

What a way to change the subject. My new job starts tomorrow and I'm already overwhelmed by it indirectly.

Crazy.

I wish October would come sooner. I bought a wig on EBAY and I feel that the closer October comes the sooner I can put it on without feeling like a loser. I know, I did say I bought a wig online. I think I'm also going to mention it's bobbed and PINK. See following picture.I think that NathaN would be so overwhelmed with jokes that he might even remain speechless this time. Here's hopin'.

Halloween is a-coming

It would be pretty funny to see a guy who was real afraid of dying, so he just lived his life in constant fear and never left his house. Also, there were corpses all over the yard, and they'd all died from trying to escape from the house.

"Hey! Lookatme-uh!"

Evil does not always look the part. Sometimes it is shaped like a cute little girl with a bottomless pit stomach, and you have to pick her up every Tuesday at Big Sisters.

NathaN is still a doofus. Happy Birthday Grandpa.

Top 5 reasons to NOT move to LA

Okay, I don't really want to upset anybody because I know this issue can be very touchy sometimes, especially since I know that the LAers and Chicagoians have a secret battle to the death. However, I've been pressured to move there since I graduated with a degree in cinema, but I prefer to live in the midwest, I'm sorry guys. It's just easier on me. Now, I'm not saying that LA is a terrible place, I'm just saying I prefer to visit OFTEN and here's why:

5. Almost no rain or clouds, meaning less days to appreciate the sunshine
4. No seasons, I love Autumn and Hot and Not Hot season doesn't really cut it, besides I like color on my trees
3. A thin layer of dust over EVERYTHING, smog isn't all its cracked up to be
2. Hardcore traffic, I can be patient, but road rage will eventually get the best of me on the left coast
1. My friends and family in Chicago, I know there is a time to let go, but it's hard to release your support system

So there you have it. These aren't terrible things, but after my trip out left last weekend these were just a few things I noticed and let soak in. So now let's all just breathe in, relax, accept it, and listen to something nice from the south coast . . . like the Dixie Chicks.

Yep. I know, there's some conflict there too.

So who wants to know about my day?

At work today I:

was yelled at by a lady who claimed that there was no difference between a small and medium size drink cup, therefore me thinking when she said she wanted a medium-small drink and I gave her a small, she was furious for not receiving a medium, because even though she can clearly see the two different sizes, apparently the small does not exist.

was fixing a chocolate ice cream cone for a customer when the machine hiccup-sneezed all over my bright green shirt. Brown and green will never be a fashion "must-do" I'm sorry to say.

walked in on a conversation about toliets. Once I heard the words, "urinal cake," "over-spray," and "uh-oh" I almost threw up.

was urged by the head cook to try his special salad. When I say "urged" I really mean "dared" because he is a prankster. His special salad is Cucumbers, Tomatoes, and hot sauce. Did I mention he's Mexican? I couldn't turn down a dare and am still suffering from it.

made myself some french fries, but the bag slipped and I ended up making three batches instead of one. The head cook really appreciated that I gave free french fries to the rest of the employees.

witnessed the rain coming in horizontally and made a mad dash outside to grab the sandwich board before my artwork dissolved away. Quickly my shirt became see-through, but good news! the chocolate stain went away.

had to give a man, who also suffered from a see-through shirt because of all the rainage, 16 RAIN CHECKS. That's right, he paid for 16 rounds of golf and he wanted them ALL back. At least through his shirt I could tell he was in shape, but he must have been cold.


Good news: I was able to leave 2 hours early due to lack of customers. So you hear that everybody? When it rains, don't come to my work because then I'll be able to go home and eat.

"Sliding Doors"

I just got back from Stefanie's (she's new and my friendshrink) and I've come to realize something I've never really thought before. Or at least, the ideas were always there, but no event has ever triggered them to make me more aware that they were up there. I hope this makes sense so far, if not, it's only going to get bumpy from here.

I also hope this post doesn't sound "too" conceited*.

Anyway, here it is: we affect people. People affect people. There's no stopping it. Doesn't matter if we've known them our whole life or just minutes. I'm going to change that person in some way and unintentionally. Good or bad. If not their personality, I could just make them late for something, which could affect them because they weren't punctual. That last sentence was lame, I'm sorry. Anyway, you get the idea.

I was told I was addicting tonight. I've met some people like that, but never was that person. It certainly is the second best compliment I ever had. The first comes from a kid who said he wanted to be just like me and go to the exact same school and find a career in the exact same field. Makes me feel like I'm doing something right. Those comments will probably change me forever, just like the people.

I was also informed tonight that I changed someone else for good. I changed someone. Can you believe it? People didn't think highly of him before, but then he dated me and now people like the certain qualities he adopted from me. Because of me, someone else is living differently. To think that someone else took a part of me with them and are using it so much that it becomes to a point where people are noticing and respecting. Crazy. I was so thrown off that the best word I can come up with is "crazy."


I have to take a breather for a minute.


I feel like my mind is racing a lot faster than I can type, so I'm pretty sure most of this isn't coming out as clear as it could, but I was so touched tonight that I had to write it down, and why not share it with the world? Have them think about those that they too have affected. Sometimes its doesn't always seem like a good affection, but don't worry. Everything happens for a reason and for better, so in the end everything will be the way that it was meant to. We learn. We grow. We're good.


*Best conceited joke from Saturday Night Live
"I love you, you know."
"I know."
"You're conceited."


Best movie to watch to understand where I'm coming from: Sliding Doors

Best quote from my great great weekend

Deanna: "Oh. Boys are great!"


A man on the airplane lifted my suitcase from the overhead compartment for me. No big deal.

Quotage

Best quotes from my scary scary weekend.

Todd: "Don't worry. Its only 12 volts."

Kelsey: "What should I do if the sirens go off while I'm driving?"
Robyn: "If there's a tornado warning, drive faster."

Little girl across the street: "Want to see our basement? Follow me, come see our basement!"
Kelsey and Robyn follow. Kelsey places one foot onto basement carpet.
Kelsey: "Ewww. Gross. Wet! Back up the stairs. Back up the stairs! Move Move Move! Robyn, turnaround, back up the stairs!"
Little girl jumping up and down on carpet: "Squishy!"

Kelsey: "Go to sleep if you want to."
Robyn: "I just want to see the flood and then I'll go back to sleep."

Robyn: "Remember in eighth grade when I used to layer my clothes all the time. It seems like everyone is doing it now."
Kelsey: "Yeah, it's cool now."


More to come, once I remember.

in trouble?

Here's a great tip to get yourself out of any sticky situation.

"Aim for her head."

Yeah, think about it. Deep, right?

The location in this story changes 4 times

A couple of summers ago I went down to Carbondale, IL to visit some friends for their birthdays, you know who you are because it was around July 19. A bunch of kids, of the college-age, were in town for the summer or the week and decided that a great big game of capture the flag in the quad would be the best way to bring everyone together for a night.

The game went pretty well, we won one, they won one, and now we were down to one last game. A girl (Whit) pocketed firecrackers and was spooking people with them. One kid (Simon) jumped off a wall and was tackled by my former roommate (Suzy). I forgot to bring shoes.

During this last game my team decides the best way to end it is to blizt (meaning: everyone but me will run over to the other side and try to capture their stupid flag). I was told to stay behind because I was the smallest and shoeless. So I'm hanging around the flag while everyone else quickly disappears.

It's quiet and I'm laying on my stomach behind a tree. I'm getting bored waiting for something to happen, so I decided I needed to practice my somersaults. This soon led to Mission Impossible theme music and clasping my hands together in a "gun" form. By the way, somersaulting soon turned into rolling and cartwheels, finished off with the nice fake gun clasp. If it were the Olympics I would definetly get a "10." No doubt.

I swear, 15 minutes passed by. And still nothing. Pretty soon, one particularly humongous man in a black cap (Cory) ran by me, plucked the flag from the tree branch (which I couldn't reach anyway) and used his gigantor-legs to speed out of there. I had no chance. And no team. Later, I learned that everyone on my team was tagged almost instantly and thrown in the jail, the other team waited for me to let my guard down before sending over Andre the Giant. I was a little mad/confused/thrown off, but since it was such a great joke on their part, I got over it rather quickly.

A little later that night, I noticed I was itchy, and so did everyone else. Really itchy. So itchy that my arms were all red, swollen, and covered in tiny little bumps. Someone (not sure who)made the comment that they looked like insect bites. I mentioned I was lying in the grass (I know that wasn't completely honest, but hey), but it was smaller than a mosquito bite. Suzy suggested ants. Apparently, she was right, I rolled through a couple of red ant hills. RED ANT HILLS. And they BITE. HARD! And there are plenty of them in Carbondale, its all very suspicious.

Quickly, my friend (Lee) and I went to the 24-hour WalMart to pick up some Benedril. He said that when he takes Benedril on the farm he usually takes two and that solves the problem instantly. So I did. Pretty soon I was passed out on the floor on my tummy, and I woke up to Josh dripping ice cold water on my back. All my limbs were immobile. I seriously thought that my arms, legs, and the floor were conjoined as one. I couldn't move. They were so heavy. And my face was like Jello.

According to the bottle I could have taken half of a Benedril and been stupendous. Oh and next time I will buy the non-drowsy kind.

Labels labels labels.

Andy thinks I'm unattractive

So there's an Ex-Commissioner who comes in to golf about twice a week. His name is Andy. Sweet-old-I forget your name-where are my keys-Hey look! you're left-handed- Andy. It's tough watching people get older, especially when you've met them a thousand and one times and they still ask for your name, even though my name tag is usually planted ever-so-nicely above my right boob. I guess that means that people just aren't lookin anymore.

So I'm taking in tee times for other golfers and checking them in. During the commotion, I notice that Andy is at the other side of the building, probably 200 yards away. Earlier, I took his keys from him because he wanted to rent a golf cart. I knew he would never give me back the golf cart keys if I didn't take away from him something that he needed to get home with, like car keys, (but now that I think about he really shouldn't be driving anyway).

So anyway, I see Andy and decided that I should probably grab the golf cart keys from him before I forget too. I quickly picked up his car keys and met him halfway for an exchange. We each smiled and traded kind words, and then I walked back to my station. It suddenly became slow, not very unusual for a weekday. So I snuck a book behind the counter and began my reading. . . and trying to be stealthy. Every now and then I would slap the keyboard to make it look like I was busy.

Next thing I know, Andy is at my station, rapping on the counter with his fingernails. I look up from my book and smile.

"Hi Andy."

"Hi there [looks at name tag] Robyn. Hey, you're reading with your left hand."

"Yep, I am. Us left-handers need to stick together."

"Ha. Yeah. Sure. Hey, have you got my car keys?"

"Oh, no. I already gave them to you. Don't you remember, I met you halfway."

Andy sticks his hands in all of his pockets in search of keys. Everything the man carries seems to be pulled out and onto the countertop in seconds. Some of these things include: 2 wallets, a stash of business cards rubberbanded together, eye drops, loose change, buttons, a safety pin, and then the keys.

(Sorry this story is getting long)

We both notice the keys on the counter top and he chuckles. "Well, you're right. There they are." Andy picks everything back up and shoves them into random pockets and then HE SPEAKS, "You know. I'm a little disappointed I had to come all the way over here."

"Why?"

"Well, I can't see that far, but I thought if I came over here you would at least be attractive."

dazed and confused

Who knew that the best relationship advice I'd ever get would be from my father.

trying, but not really trying, to be a good role model every'wear'

I was at Target the other day looking for a new sports bra and I ran into a girl I knew in high school, like that wasn't awkward enough, and since I'm known to flee awkward situations before they happen, unfortunately I was caught off-guard by the new sports bras with padding in them (they make your boobs pointy, so if you ever want full support and secretly impersonate Madonna). Anyway, this new support system completely grabbed my attention and convinced me to start inspecting the fluffy insides of the bra. I heard my name behind the pajama pants rack and there is what's-her-name, yeah that's right. I don't remember her name. Don't even remember a friend we have in common. Or a class we had together. But there she is WITH HER KID!! I'm not even 22 yet, and SHE HAS A KID. . . of TODDLER age! While talking with What's-Her-Name and What's-Her-Name's-Third-Base-Oopsy I remember thinking this is why I flee these situations to begin with, because of superficial conversation. "Hi, how are you?" "Good. And you?" "Good. What have you been up to?" "Just finished school. And you?" "Working part-time at Walgreens." "Well, its good to have goals in life."

I think the conversation took a real turn up-hill when I told her open-eared youngling about how someday she too will be able to try on stiff sports bras.

Bambi vs Godzilla

We were talking about this in work today and it sort of was a blast from the past. I haven't seen it since eighth grade at a chirstian retreat. Weird. Still makes me laugh though.

everything will be ok

I believe in this.

opening up the possibilities

So I've been catching up on my movie watching these last two days. I tell ya, it's great. No work. No responsibilities. No trouble. No hassle. No customers. I love it. I think I want to become a movie critic. Yep, watch movies and write about them.

Except, I don't know if I'd be able to sit around all day, every day, doing nothing.

OKAY NEW PLAN!!

I will have a real job on Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays, and then a movie watching fake job on Sundays and Tuesdays. Saturdays and Holidays are for practicing bungee jumping and learning how to belly dance.

HEY!!! Look what I can do.

So look what I've learned to do with Photoshop. Suhweet!! Now, I can make my pics all glowy and fantastic. Actually, I've always been able to do this, but now I can do it in as little as three steps. Hey, I should teach a class on creativity or something, after the last dull class I've taken, mine would probably be like an amusement park thrill. Not to brag or anything, it was just that slow. Wait. Can you teach someone to be creative? Isn't that a gene you can get from your mother? It's like showing someone how to draw, or be funny. Either you can or can't. Okay, since I've now just realized this, I'm going to disprove this idea in my class.

Alright, I know I know. Lame, right? At least I can find excitement in my ideas.

Oh. . . I'd love it if you broke my arm!

I have a sore elbow. I fell the other night and alcohol was NOT involved. I'm not much of a drinker, but people seem to think it was the cause of my sore elbow. I mean, it was pretty clumsy, and most drunk people have better coordination anyway.

I've been wearing a sling. It helps a lot with the pain, but since it's wrapped around my good arm, its only dead weight. I've been getting a lot of broken wing jokes at work.

I kinda dig the sling though, it brings back my elementary years. I sort of want a cast, too. I’ve never had a broken arm before but I used to fantasize about breaking something. I used to dream, ”If only I had a cast on my arm, then every thing would be great." I swear, thoughts of a fresh white cast danced in my head. I’d be so popular what with all the other kids lining up to sign it.

I used to plot out several bone-breaking plans, but I never had any guts to pull them off. A lot of free falling ideas. Then of course, I'd get jealous when someone else would strut in with a freshly slapped-on cast. "I don't care if its hurting YOUR arm, give it to me!"

I'm not very exciting for having a house to myself

So I've been feeling lousy lately and I decided that what I need is really a good night's sleep. I have the house to myself tonight (very excited) so what I'm doing now is making a reMIX cd of ocean waves and some nice mello cello. Then, I'm going to slather on some Banana Boat SPF 15. I love the smell of suntan lotion. Mmmmmm. So I figure the beach-like sent will waft directly to some part of my brain while I sleep and conjure up an ocean, hammock, coconuts, and cute boys.

Ha. I'm playing mind control with my own mind! If it doesn't work, at least I can use the lotion as a nice mosturizer.

London battle over "Purity Ring"

I'm not really sure why, but I found this article really interesting. Ironically, not really the part about kids practicing their faith at school,(which has its problems too) but the fact the school banned jewelry altogether. I'm sort of curious how strict the high schools in London really are, I thought my high school was bad when girls had to be completely covered up from neck to knees, but it sounds like in London, wardrobe almost has to be completely preapproved before worn in school. It kind of seems like they want to make the public schools private, but non-religiously.

I don't know, see for yourselves. Click for “purity ring” link.

Sad Song Video Guy

I saw this on dooce.com, she had a daily link to it. It's kind of a long video, but Fredo created it in AfterEffects. It reminds me a little of Imogene Heap and I love the sky montage at the end. Anyway, it's really. . . neat.

The Sad Song Video


Reader's To Do List: Look into Imogene Heap

Mitchers!

I rent a lot of cars, but I don't always know everything about them. So a lot of times, I drive for like ten miles with the emergency brake on. That doesn't say a lot for me, but it really doesn't say a lot for the emergency brake. It's really not an emergency brake, it's an emergency "make the car smell funny" lever.

kelsey note #2

NYBOR

Robyn my dearest

What should we call that guy who likes you? We should call him a name. . . like

STOP READING
You are a bad listener.

Maybe we should name him Trihsder <-(red shirt)
or
Hemp necklace man
speaking of hemp necklaces . . . I'm a fan

How are you paying attention to this? I don't think you are actually listening. I think you are daydreaming about Trihsder. I can see it on your face you are picturing what your kids would look like aren't you? Robyn slow down. we don't even know Trishder's last name. how do we know it will sound good with Nybor?

I just looked up for a second to look like I am paying attention and all I heard him say was "and, and, it, and, er, and, but." That is what I have gotten out of this lecture.

Agh please stop talking Enrique(snaps) you have to snap after a name like enrique.


Y A H O O O O O O O O O !

29% of people still use Yahoo? I bet they are from the south.

I can't believe he has been talking about search engines for 40 mins! Your eyes are totally glazed over. Woah he totally came over and walked behind us. He wants to read your note! back off Enrique(snaps)

Oh my gosh Trishder keeps looking over hear. <-hear? that is so wrong!

Agh I have to leave!!! I can't handle over 3 hours of this class. ADD has taken over my brain. I hope you are taking good notes. Oh wait we don't need notes it is all in the book! I am leaving.

Kels to the ey

kind of scary

Interestingly, I don't remember much of what happened today. I mean, that sounds odd, but . . . I really can't. It freaks me out a little, like I need to be locked up or something (though, hopefully not as intense as that). Right now, I'm sitting in my room with my laptop in the lap (literally) with that groggy, sleep-all-day feeling. This is what I do remember:

waking up
washing hair & brushing teeth
eating lunch
working on T-shirts
getting ready for and showing up to work
feeling very heated and barfing in the bathroom at work . . . twice
Mom waking me up at home, in bed, in non-work clothes.

So I know that there has to be something in between getting sick and waking up because I drove myself to work and I couldn't have just left without anyone knowing, I mean, and I had to have told somebody I wasn't feeling good, right? AND my car is definitely in the driveway right now.

Maybe I was just very concentrated on getting out of there and home that I forgot what happened, like I was in a daze. . . or a zombie? Scary, right?

So anyway, if I called or texted any of you, I'm sorry. I was probably in panic/guilt mode.


Moral of the story: Don't eat tomatoes when you have an ulcer.



Alright, enough of that. I think I should go back to bed.

buyer beware

So . . . I'm a big fan of Lipton's Green Tea, it's quite delicious. You shake it and then drink it and everything's great. It's so great that I wanted to try the NEW! White Tea. Here's the thing, I shook it and then TRIED to drink it, but it fizzled everywhere like a volcanic eruption and everything was NOT great.

I figured this was a fluke or something. I mean, why would it explode everywhere? So, of course I had to shake another one and open it.

EXPLOSION!!

I searched the label for where it should say to shake it up, but instead it read, "For best taste. . . drink by date on bottle."

[face turning red with anger]

Soon after, the doorbell rang and the UPS guy had a package to deliver and I'm pretty sure he was chuckling at my brand-new Lipton White Tea-produced see-through T-shirt.

This is why you don't drink caffiene at 2 in the morning

Once upon a time there was an ugly man. He lived in the Jungle.
He was half man half monster. He ate green gorillas. When he was 3 he was very nice. Then when he was 12 he turned into a monster! His name is the Purple Graveyard Monster.
His planet was called Oookkyy. He has a space ship. It can go 8,000,000 miles a day. On Thursday 1980 he went to earth that very day.
Then he saw another planet. It was called Earth.
Then he landed in the Mississippi river.
Then the monster saw something. It was Captain America!
Captain America fainted. He was hypnotized. Then he got un-hypnotized. For that he shot a laser at him. Captain America took his shield out and Palaaka! It reflected back to the monster!
...to be continued...

Mitchness

I was going to have my teeth whitened, but then I said "F that, I'll just get a tan instead

life is a highway and I want to jump out of the moving vehicle

So last night I took my cousin out driving, he's fifteen and a little shaky. It was interesting, it reminded me of when I first started, but Nate (who was sitting in the back seat) was the best back seat driver I've ever seen. That means he was absolutely and fantasically annoying, for all of those who couldn't pick up on the irony.

Anyway, while I was yelling at Nate for talking so much, my cousin kept taking HIS side, because it was easier work on him.

R- "Okay, Jonathan. Now switch into the next lane. We're going to take a right at the light up there."

N- (Looks back) "You're good. Move over now."

R- "Nathan! At least wait for him to look so HE knows its okay to move over."

J- "No. I like it when he tells me."

R- "Yeah, because he's doing your work. This isn't something you need to learn once and you're done with it."

N- "Shut up, Robyn."

Sparklers

feeling a rumbly

Rice is great when you're hungry and you want 2,000 of something.

the #1 carpet installation team

An interesting event happened today and rather I go into detail (I'm a little angry and I don't really want to say anything mean or regretful), I'm just going to say this: When you're providing a service there are three things you should just not do: 1. Show up unannounced 2. Stay for 6.5 hours 3. Leave small traces of blood on the door, around the sink, or on the floor.

Other than that, there's no doubt we'll be on good terms.

Darwin Award #122: Cow Bomb

A dairy worker who heard that bovine flatulence was largely composed of methane, and potentially explosive, decided to apply the scientific method to the theory. While one of his contended cow charges was hooked up to the milking machine, he waited for the slight tail lift that dairy workers know signals an impending explusion, generally something one avoids. Our hero struck a match.

His satisfaction at seeing the resulting foot-long blue flame lasted mere seconds, before the flame was subsumed by a rectal contraction. The poor Holstein exploded, killing the worker, who was struck by a flying femur bone.

Albert Einstein

"Only two things are infinite-the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe."

"Dad quote"

"Growing up, my Mom told me that when the ice cream truck played music that meant they were OUT of ice cream."

talk about pathetic

So Kelsey and I are back from Michigan and sore (from which you should already know) and we have a night class together at Harper. Now the stairs in front of the building were a little challenging, but they are shallow, so we managed. . . very slowly. The hardest part to come were the set of front doors. We each grabbed a door handle and yelled in pain. Seeing that there was no easy way to do this, I managed to widdle my foot through the open space and get my door open, but Kelsey was still having trouble with hers. So after sliding through my open door, I went inside and leaned my back against her closed door, only to only help open it as she pulled it forward. However, I forgot that I had sunburn on my back. . . really bad sunburn. So here we are, and I'm sure any onlooker would be in much confusion as to why two girls can't seem to get a door open like regular people. I'm screaming as I'm pushing with my back and Kelsey is screaming by pulling with her arms.

What losers, right? The door finally opened, but we didn't really feel much accomplishment after glancing at the staircase ahead.

and now I'm back. . . from outer space

Well, back from Michigan and more sore than ever. Spending all day in the sun and on a boat really does a toll. My skin and muscles ache from the sun and playing in the water.

WATER TUBING ROCKS!!! I felt like James Bond,(and pretended to be him) it was awesome. We introduced Dea and Jodi to tubing and I think they've become lifers. Everyone needs to join the club, it's the greatest experience you'll meet when you can still form a grip.

Then there's also chocolate covered pretzels, which are scrumptious. I'm a big fan, especially when they hand make them in front of you at the Fudge Shoppe. I'd marry a guy if he gave me chocolate covered pretzels (not really an exaggeration, but I could still be under their delicious spell).

Vacation pictures to come. . .

sorry kels

::Caution::


A picture of Kelsey will be added to the side bar soon.


::Beware of too much beauty on one site::

Flying Solo

Well. . . its official, Robyn is flying solo. The other night, we talked till about 4 in the morning and I explained to him that continuing things would probably be a bad idea. I mean, don't you think? He comes here in July and then leaves in September, and back to being 4 1/2 hours away again. I know its wierd to not be as impulsive as I usually am, but for some reason, I kept thinking about the future and this whole situation would only mess with my head. I hate it when that happens.

Everythings fine though, I don't want to call myself a heart breaker because I'm not sure if his is actually broken, but let's just say his expectations were not met, I'm a expectations un-meet-er.

Anyway, I sort of felt sad at work yesterday because I was so tired and in kind of a down mood. I ended up going out with the TL gang afterwards, I told myself to go because being around a lot of people was probably a good idea. It was fun, but I had to leave early, I was so exhausted from having "One of Those Days."

Anyway, I leave for Michigan today!! Yeah for getting away!!

the recuperating story. . . its a good one

Okay, I promised the story and I sort of forgot to mention it earlier. . . sorry.

So here's what happened last Thursday, I was at work all day (and by all day I mean till 4), but starting at 2:30 I got a very sharp pain in the right side of my back. So at work, I asked David (the head cook) if he knew where the spleen was located (I now automatically assume that all problems with my organs involve the spleen. . . because it's fun to say), but David had no idea what I was talking about, so I kept holding onto the ache and help the customers at the same. Cary then came into site and so I asked him, he had no idea, but decided to print me off a picture of the anatomy of a human body. I found the spleen rather quickly, unfortunately though, he gave me the picture while 5 other guys hovered around the customer service area. Most of those guys are smart-mouthed, and if you work at Twin Lakes you know who I mean. So they came up with tons of organs that are probably wrong with me: liver, kidney stones, liver stones (supplied by David who's treatment is to go drinking with him), gallbladder, appenidx, etc. Then of course, one of them yelled out, "Maybe you're pregnant!"

{gasp}

I really wanted to ___________ (insert physical abuse here) that guy, because I'm sure you all can imagine what the rest of the guys did and the harassing I put up with.

I was still in pain, which had then spread from the right side of my back to the left and frontside. It was almost 4 by this time so I asked to leave, pretty much because I couldn't take the pain and the harassing anymore. I called Mom on my way home, thinking, "Hey. Maybe we should see the doctor." Except, she thought it was just muscle fatigue and kept trying to feed me pain reliever. "You worked out this morning, I'm positive it's just from that."

I think I know the difference between muslce and organ pain. After about 20 minutes of Mom not listening and telling me going to the doctor is a bad idea (insurance reasons, I'm no longer on the parents account) I had to do something beside hold my stomach and lay in the fetal position. I mean, at least taking a Zantac could help. . . and it did. All the pain, everywhere, went away. Robyn-1 : Mom-0

Unfortunately, it appears that my ulcer is back and now I have to be careful. . . again. I hate being stressed. Raise your hand if you think Robyn is going to have a heart attack before she's 30!

blubber lips

So today, when I was eating lunch, I stabbed my mouth with my fork and now my lip is a little swollen and squishy. . . talk about an eating disorder.

Kelsey's note

I haven't had Kelsey write me a note in class since Freshamn year of high school. So it was interesting to see what she had to say, and then of course I read it:

Robyn

We should go to Michigan again at the end of July or august. So Becks can go. Have you ever met Joanna or Michelle? You need to meet my grown up friends. . . They are cool.
I really have to pee.
Peeing gets its own paragraph, I have to pee. I have to pee. I have to pee. Hey Hey Hey Hey.
Did we ever get Becky another present? What should
CHEATER!
we get for her?
DOUBLE CHEATER
I want to hang out with Lauren Erbach. I should call her. Is she still engaged?
Sunny called me on monday and I forgot to call him back. ooops lets call him at the break
{Insert 5 images of stars} You are my shining star.

Love Kels

Where to begin. . .

I think life is too funny to go unnoticed. . . so I think this is the best way to get me to start writing again.

I know this first post is short and sweet, but I haven't decided yet where to begin.

Tomorrow.


Tomorrow will be a good day to start this blog because as of now, right now, I'm sort of still. . . 'recuperating.' There's a story worth mentioning behind all of this, but not today. Someday when you're ready.