Do you ever get tired of yourself? Like, do you ever feel like you're completely disgusted with who you are and wish for just one hour could be someone else? I mean, there may not be anything wrong with you at all, but you're just tired of being you? Doing the same old things, saying the same old things, being the same old thing, etc.
When I was in high school, I'd pick out a random kid in the lunch room and develop my own story about who they are and why they act the way they did. . . all in my head, of course. I think that's why I love people watching. I'm just fascinated with the way people socialize and behave. I hated the college parties, but if I was dragged to a random stranger's house, I'd be the one secretly spying on others, eavesdropping into conversations, and then fending off boys the rest of the time, of course. Just kidding. But seriously, so many boys. Ha.
Maybe I'm not tired of myself, but just bored. A wise teacher once told me that if you're bored, it's because you're boring. So I try not to say that I'm bored. However, right now I don't feel as exciting and as adventurous as I used to be. I'd used to take midnight joy rides and let my soul evaporate into the music on the road. . . and barefoot. You had to be barefoot too. I always got a lot of thinking done when it was just me and Donny (my crazy chevy).
Now, I'll pretend to be someone else for a minute. I see a lot of people at work. So sometimes I'll copy a mannerism I see or speak with an accent I overhear. For some reason, it takes me out of the world, just for a minute. It makes life more interesting. I should really be an actress. This is totally an acting exercize, isn't it?
I guess until I find a 'me' I really like I'll have to play off of others. It's like Kelsey's adopt-a-laugh.
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